Bluebirdbaby

Holidaying

Well, I love getting things out in the open. Writing, processing, getting it all out there...it all helps in taking a step back and really observing the situation and how you'd like to proceed with it. Nothing has changed except my attutide about it. I've always made the best of whatever I'm given, but even with doing that I can still feel mournful for what I know could be. But, enough of that! It couldn't BE because it ISN'T! So I am making the best of what I've got while accepting that it's exactly what it is, and could never be anything else.

That probably sounds like much more nonsense all written out than it actually is in my head. But there it is. Thanks for being there through it all. This space is such a gift.

We've surely been making the best of our time this holiday season. Lots of baking, present making, cookie delivering, tree decorating, and holiday music singing (shall I mention the night the little one and I had an impromptu caroling experience? we skipped merrily while singing around the neighborhood like silly people in the dark!). And there are the things like the Christmas cards that will never be finished or even make it in the mail (how about New Year's cards?!), the tins of treats I wanted to make and deliver, the presents I can't afford, and all the rest that just aren't meant to be. And that's okay. Because with what we have, we are having so much fun with it. And that's the best.

I haven't even been capturing all our daily activities with my camera. Taking even a second away from those moments seems like too much. Sometimes I pull my iPhone out and capture the goodness. So above is all the goodness from cooking baking (twice!), packaging, delivering, and holiday cheer around town. We have been having so much fun...!

What have you been up to this holiday season?!

thoughts on a busy life

We all lead busy lives. We all lead hectic lives. Most of us probably try to lead these busy lives with all intentions of simplicity, and well...still run around all day wondering when we'll actually get a moment to just be.

Sometimes at the end of the day, when I finally finish parenting, working, taking care of the house and animals, I wonder if I'd ever actually breathed at all? Or did I ever even sit down?!  I get so caught up in the moment, and then the next, and the next one after that, that is seems as though the day flies by and my intentions of simplicity and slowness get devoured by the pace of life.

But then I get photos like these back. I remember these moments. I remember the slowness, the simplicity, the awareness...all present when I took each one. And I am reminded that in the midst of the chores, keeping track of a little one, the cooking and cleaning, and running a business, that there really is plenty of those moments that I strive for all day long. They are there, however brief. These photos are a reminder of that. Just looking at them now makes my breath slower, my heart rate slows, and I feel grateful for the little moments like this that make up our days.

It is, really, all about balance. xoxo

Expired film from a kind reader! Thank you! I haven't touched my digital camera in days. Also, please check out the new sponsors on the right! Yay!

fairy woods

It's been a funny weekend. Probably others would call it a weekend full of unfortunate events. I've been meaning to post about "a year of choice" for a while now...letting you know more about how this affects my days and what it looks like. And I can honestly say that this space is all about choice. What you read here are snippets of our days. The things I love, the things that make life go round, the things that make us smile, the things that fill our hearts with love. It doesn't mean that there isn't a whole lot of struggle and, ahem, bad luck too. (Sometimes I think I'm jinxed!) But it's easy to get through it with this fabulous guy and amazing little girl by my side.

This past weekend was indeed a series of unfortunate events. It got to the comical level after two days, and when we finally sat down on the couch late last night to breathe, we looked at each other and giggled, joking that maybe the roof would fall through on our heads. But in the end, we caught something just in the knick of time and our cat will live, we still have another way to get around and we did get home finally, there are friends and family always willing to help, after hours of research I finally fixed my camera, and we are safe and happy and together. Which really...is all that matters.

So what does all this have to do with fairy woods?! Well, in the midst of all the unfortunate events, we all took a beautiful walk on an island with my mama and the two dogs. We flew kites, we walked through the forest, waded in the water, and came to the spot where there are hundreds and hundreds of fairy houses. We built a fabulous one. And I remember in that moment, looking at the absolute certainty on the little one's face that fairies would be moving in to our little fairy house that very night, I knew that this was the only moment that really mattered. And, to be honest, I'm not sure if it's from the sheer exhaustion or the hilariously poor memory I have, but really...it's all that I really remember. That one moment was so full of joy and love that it's going to be completely and totally stuck in my heart forever. Love that.

And yes, the little one got her first haircut. She loves it. We do too.

xoxo.

tonight

tonight while the peepers were singing

and the birds were chirping

and a wee one was running in and out, out and in giggling

and the water was boiling

and i sat prepping beans

 

i thought

 

what a perfectly wonderful moment. what a perfectly wonderful life. no matter what extravagant thing happens, or some wonderfully momentous news, all i really need and want are moments just like this.

After It All

I woke up with a pinched nerve.

I can't turn my head in either direction.

I can't really use my right arm.

And the pain is excrutiating.

BUT...it's pizza night. And it was so, so good. (Next time I'll add rosemary and olives.)

And the rain keeps coming, which is good for the garden and gives me an excuse to "take it easy" as the doctor says.

We're gearing up for bedtime here...the little one just went on one last walk with Sasa and the dogs. Then it's stories and a long night of rest.

Tomorrow is a new day. A brand new day. So much is possible.

And I know that despite the pain, the challenges, and the things that seem impossible, I thank my lucky stars for these two amazing beings I get to spend my life with.

enjoying

enjoying the way the sun fills our wee home. every corner of every room is filled at some point during the day.

enjoying all the dandelions the little one picks for me all day long, and the rosemary plant i promised to keep alive more than one season.

enjoying the clothes on the line, which dry so much faster than they did in 30 degree weather.

enjoying dandelion crowns, running through the grass in barefeet, and swinging on the tire swing.

enjoying my gals. (photo by the little one) they are so dear to me. i love them more than i can say.

what are you enjoying right now?

Yesterday Hopscotch, Today Snow

Yesterday we cleared the sidewalk of the excess dirt from the winter.

We swept and giddily ran around with our sidewalk chalk drawing people, writing love notes, and playing hopscotch.

Then today we woke up to snow. Inches of snow. So we made the best of it. We giggled as we ran through the slush, getting our (so not snow boots) shoes wet, and ended the afternoon by making a snow family on our front steps. They are still out there, waving to all the passersby. They make me happy.

So we are trying to enjoy this last bit of snow, knowing that it won't be long before Mrs. Thaw really does her job (the little one asked all day for Mrs. Thaw to come and sweep away the snow) and it will be months before we get another snow day.

 

On another note, last night was a night full of work for me so I never made my Monday link list! So sorry. Next week for sure because I have some AWESOME links! Happy Tuesday everyone! Tell me something that is making you happy this week!

.cleanse.

I sat on the backporch this afternoon writing letters.

Sometimes giving yourself permission to slow down is a lovely thing.

I sat for hours, writing.

I allowed myself some extra rest this morning and then followed it with a 6 mile run.

First 6 miler since early last winter.

The roads are clearing, the snow is melting, the moon's craziness is slowly waning, and I'm feeling a need for some cleansing, just as Mother Earth is cleansing all around us.

The greens are on the stove, the rice is almost finished, and we are moments away from sitting down to reflect upon our day and enjoy a simple feast.

Happy Weekend to you! And Happy Spring too!

54 in March

Today I ran in a sleeveless shirt and what felt like too-short shorts (these pasty white legs felt a little modest after a long winter). It felt so good. I think my body had forgotten what it was like to run without my lungs practically freezing.

We spent the day mostly outdoors, but this morning we opened windows, mopped every hard floor in the house, put the blankets to air out on the line, then we sat on the back porch letting the sun hit our faces and make us feel alive again.

The world is changing around us...snow is melting and we are seeing bulbs pop up out of the muddy soil. Birds are chirping in the threes above, and the air smells like life again. We talk a lot about the root children waking up below the ground and how they are polishing all the beetles, mending their spring clothes, and helping to push up all the flowers right now. The little one is changing right along with it. Her bleached blonde summer hair has been too long out of the sun and is darker. Freckles started popping up on her nose today, reminding me of my sister. She's growing so fast and I'm constantly amazed by her maturity and sweet presence.

This afternoon we mended the chicken fence, then sat down in the sun to read more of our favorite spring books. "To Market, To Market" inspired a hunt in the stream for salmon which we caught and then "smoked" in some birch trees. We then headed to the farm (the local market) to pick some lettuce, an avocado from the tree, and dig up some garlic from the dirt. On our way home we collected our smoked salmon and headed home with our loot to make a delicious spring-inspired dinner. So much fun!

This evening we did some more fishing in the river. Fly got his feet wet in the cold salt water and we all walked home by the light of the almost full moon.

What a beautiful 54 degree day in March. It was surely enough joy to last a long time!

Breath

This is my view from the sink in the kitchen. This side of our house faces another house, so my view isn't the greatest, although I've hidden it with plants. I love this window.

It is often when I am washing dishes that I remember to breathe. I focus on breath, relaxing my body, and opening up to the wonderfulness of today.

The crystals, the Buddha statues, and the life of the plants do wonders on my spirit. I breathe in their peace and exhale my worries.

I find that living in Maine, the winter is the time when we really need to take care of ourselves. Allow ourselves that nice long bath at the end of the day, or the splurge of really good chocolate once a week. It really is the greatest gift we can give ourselves...when we care about ourselves as much as we care for others.

So go do something wonderful for yourself...take a bath, escape into a quiet room to read a book, eat a second helping of dessert, go on a walk, dance around the room until you're tired, and just love yourself. Because you are worth it.

Oh yes and Snow!

Oh, you have no idea how tickled I was to open my inbox in the wee hours of the morning and find all your lovely comments. You are THERE, you are CHOOSING! And that's wonderful! I am so thrilled beyond belief that you are joining me. Just think about all the people out there who might be choosing now. And think of the trickling affect that will have on others and pretty soon there are a whole bunch of people choosing joy and peace and happiness. So freakin' awesome.

I wanted to reply to each and every comment. Some brought tears to my eyes. Others asked questions I want to answer. And some were overjoyed by the possibility of choice. And every single one of you (even if you didn't comment and are still joining in) are awesome and wonderful and amazing. I can't wait to see what comes of this.

If you are joining in and would like your blog added to my sidebar, please e-mail me at ewallacephoto{at}gmail.com and put "A Year of Choice" in the title, and your blog link in the message first, I will add it!

Thank you thank you thank you for being such awesome people. You make me smile and laugh and love life even more!!!

With that said, I really needed to show you all just how much snow we've been dealing with. Not just inches...oh no...feet. And numerous feet at that. The town plow guy told me FIVE FEET to be exact. It is well over the little one's head. The piles in front of our house are almost 6 feet high. Pretty soon our windows will be covered. It's a tad insane.

I used to dream as a small child about it snowing so much that our house was buried and we would have to tunnel everywhere we went. But now that it's kind of happening, I'm not so sure it's that fun. But making snow igloos sure is!

The little one thinks it great. While I was shoveling the 4 feet of snow the plow left in our walkway and driveway for the fourth time in a day, the little one said, "Mama, I wish it was winter all year long!" Which made me totally chuckle and thankfully shovel the snow that surely wouldn't be there all year long. (Or maybe it will with these ginormous piles...)

But she's having fun and we are enjoying it while it lasts. Hey...it just means more knitting and baking and soup making and snow shoeing and cross country skiing and snow forts and sledding adventures. And thank goodness for seed catalogs that keep us hopeful that green grass will appear again someday...

So, what's your weather like?!

A Year of Choice

Many people have e-mailed me asking if I was going to do another 30 Day of Beauty challenge. I thought about it long and hard. I wanted to, but something was holding me back. Perhaps I needed more of a challenge, perhaps I didn't have the time now to commit to a post everyday, or maybe I was just such in a good rhythm with blogging, that I didn't want to mess with it.

So much in my life has shifted and changed, even since the last 30 Days of Beauty challenge. I began thinking about all we've been through, everything everyone's been through, and realized that I needed to take it in another direction. Life just keeps on happenin'. Everyday, heck...every second, something happens in your life that gives you a choice. A choice between acceptance and gratitude, or misery and unhappiness.

It could be as simple as "Oh dear...we're out of coffee." Or something as serious as a life threatening disease. But, as humans, we have the remarkable option of choice. All in how we deal with whatever is handed to us.

I'm very mindful of the choice I have everyday. It's much more on my mind these days than the beauty I have learned to find everywhere, even in the midst of February in Maine. Making a conscious effort to pick our of the "postive jar" instead of the "negative jar" anytime life throws something not so cool in your face can really be empowering.

We have the option of choosing happiness, joy, love, and goodness. And I know that sometimes choosing to wallow in our pain and misfortune seems so much easier and sometimes much needed. Been there. Done that. And this is exactly why I need this challenge. I was that happy, bubbly person who didn't seem to be brought down by life's hardships. A co-worker once said, "Despite the crap you've been through, you are the happiest and most positive person I know." That stuck with me. I liked hearing that. But then life kept on coming and kept hitting us at every angle possible, and I began to weaken under the weight of its, excuse my language, shit. And I start noticing myself, drained energy and all, falling for that misery. Which is SO not cool!

Then I'm reminded every single day I come on here, that I can choose. And that's what I do. I consistently choose, because that's our gift. And I don't want to waste such a wonderful gift as that. Would you?!

So this isn't a 30 day challenge, but rather a challenge for the year. It doesn't have to be daily or weekly. I want it to be genuine and totally in the moment. Post about your choices and how they have affected your life. Post about joy or happiness. Post about awesomeness in the midst of hardship. Or just post about awesomeness because it's there. Post about a cup of coffee that saved a hard morning or the glass of wine that saved a hard day. Or the knitting that brings you back to your joy several times throughout the day.

And all of this is tied into joy, beauty, happiness, and mindfulness. There are so many ways to go about it. And at the root of it all is choice.

I don't even know which direction my posts will head, but I do know that I sat down to write this without a single idea in mind and look what came out. Oh yes, a year of choice. That's exactly what I need.

Will you join me? Let's make 2011 a year of choice which will bring joy and happiness and beauty in its path.

I've made a blog button for anyone who joins. Here's the code!

<a border="0" href="http://bluebirdbaby.typepad.com/bluebirdbaby/2011/02/a-year-of-choice.html " target="_blank"><img src="http://img713.imageshack.us/img713/489/yearofchoice.jpg"/></a>

Leave a comment if you decide to join! I'd love to here from you!