Bluebirdbaby

it was like this

i woke up to thunder and lightning at 3 a.m. this morning.

my first thunderstorm while living on the water.

the thunder echoed all the way down the river to the ocean. the most beautiful and eerie sound i've ever heard.

i laid in bed listening to the rain hitting the windows, and i snuggled with the cats.

i awoke late to a dark room. thinking it was so early in the morning, i let myself doze.

i was surprised to find it was much later than i thought. i got up, made tea and worked in my jammies.

i'm headed out for dinner now, having spent the day drinking tea, eating chocolate, and working hard on my e-course. a very inspiring lesson that even inspired me as i was writing it. nothing could be better.

i made a new mix that i'm listening to now, while sipping a half glass of white wine, wishing for sun.

tomorrow the little one comes back and i will once again snuggle into her small familiar body, and we will giggle and smile and continue our rhythm once more.

happy tuesday, friends. xoxo

for one

the little one is off having adventures with her papa and i find myself here alone, with my fourth cup of tea and third piece of chocolate, working and working and working some more. so much work (and jobs!) to make this a possibility.

thinking about her, her smile, and her giggles, and just how much she's been chattering excitedly non-stop (i must admit, i am enjoying the mental space right now!), and how we've been doing so much together...journaling, painting, sketching, biking, running, walking, cooking, eating, exploring, laughing, and enjoying.

it's funny how life can shift so much on a daily basis. i've learned that having any type of expectations really just doesn't get me anywhere. hopes and dreams? sure. but really...being right here, right now is the most important thing. knowing that even this moment will not last, and i'll be experiencing something so entirely different and maybe even unexpected before i know it.

i think that's my lesson right now...one that i am so desperately trying to learn and master. no expectations...just living right now in whatever this moment brings. knowing it is perfect, and the next moment will be perfect too, because that's exactly what i'm supposed to be doing.

yup. i think that's it. for now anyway...

stuff

"stuff" from the last few days. vacation week was jam packed full of adventure, and unfortunately for you, i have grown fond of carrying my light and compact film camera around instead of the digital one. so i have 6 rolls of film waiting to be developed when i finally get money. so for now, images of our adventures will have to wait, but they find their way here soon...i hope! here are some shots from home in the meantime...

a coffee kind of morning.

breakfast with my girl. bagel with homemade jelly for her, and two fried eggs and tea for me.

some days are easier than others....

she is loving this horse print above the bed.

i've been doodling. a lot. and painting too. will show more soon...

her new art wall.



and lastly...a tulip she picked for me while i was out on a run. what a special surprise upon returning. she's a sweet one, that girl...

 

hope you are all enjoying your week, my friends! what music are you all listening to? i need some new tunes!

yesterdays and tomorrows

do you ever notice that when you're having a rough time, or you think you just want the day to end so you can make no more mistakes or say the wrong things or think about just how not that great you are, and then there is one thing...one single little thing...that turns it all around? that makes the rest of the day melt away and disappear and become nothing. when you realize the suffering you just put yourself through because of your damn thoughts was just so not worth it, and how absolutely ridiculous it was to entertain such thoughts in the first place?

well, that's been my week, friends. ups and downs. highs and lows. figuring this life thing out. it's all such an interesting process. i love observing it. i love witnessing it all. i love feeling it all. even when it's hard.

i remember a particularly lonely night, with no little one here, when i realized just how different everything is. and i became a bit overwhelmed by it as i sat at the computer working. then i looked over and saw this rose geranium my friend had spent the winter rooting for me, and i just planted it in that pot finally. and the sunset light was just pouring over it and through the leaves. it looked gorgeous. and then i remembered that i'm surrounded by so much awesomeness.

and thank goodness i woke up in a different place after that. i woke up ready to get on with it all. to leave a lot behind and dive into the now. i was excited. i'm fully prepared to sink back into the trap of all the yesterdays, but i feel like i'm a little more prepared to get myself out quicker now.

and i guess, that's all we can ever do. knowing that tomorrow will come and we take it as it is. we are just grateful it is there, and when it's done we can find comfort in knowing the next day will come, and the next, and the next. it's like a never-ending gift. pretty awesome.

so that's where i've been, my friends. how about you? xoxo

it's like this

oh, you all. you all have been through so many manifestations of this space here. and maybe i lost some of you along the way, but i do know there are many of you still here. and i believe that the more real i get with myself in this space, the more i connect with others feeling the same. and i attract readers with a similar energy, or something here resonates with them and they know they are meant to be here, reading all i have to say.

there has been a shift over the past couple of years to something more real. more honest. more open. and i want to continue with that. because life is about learning and growing, and heck...i'm not afraid to admit that! and if someone finds what i have to say inspiring and it helps them on their own journey, then well...that's all i could really ask for.

last night i got thinking. i was thinking about everything. contemplating life and what it's about. i was sitting on the couch journaling. and i was feeling rather sad. i stopped for a moment and posted here...that picture where i may look sleepy, but really i was just thinking. and i should have said more, but i was too tired at that point to really write anything. so here i am now.

i thought all through the night (it was a very restless sleep) and i woke at an early 6 a.m. to the sun slowly rising through the big window in the bedroom. i laid there in bed for an hour, thinking. i slept with my camera on the next pillow in hopes of catching that sunrise for a project i'm working on. and i did. i took some pictures without even moving my head from the pillow. and i stayed there thinking some more about life and what it's about. and then i went on a long run and thought some more.

and i thought that maybe, just maybe, there is a way to shift things. to take a situation and make it different. to observe your immediate reactions and behaviors which have been a certain way your entire life and change them. notice them. create an awareness around them that is so constant that there is no way to continue thinking in a certain way. and that's kind of liberating to recognize that.

i believe i'll never stop growing and learning and changing. i feel like a river...just flowing around bends and curves and along straight stretches to wherever it takes me. i don't argue with it. i just go with it. there are no wrong turns, it all just takes you exactly where you are meant to go.

and that's what i thought about today, and where i've arrived tonight.

thanks for listening, friends. xoxo

crazy

it's been a long day.
a good one, but busy and long.
and now it's over.
i'm listening to lana del ray on pandora
and catching up with clients
and thinking about eating some chocolate
and going through photos i took today
and thinking about watching a grey's anatomy on hulu
and then bed.
but it's only 10, and i've come to learn that living alone i tend to stay up until 1-2 a.m. and rise at an early 6 a.m.
and i keep going all day, on 4 cups of tea, perfectly happy and content with it all.
how crazy life can be. i love it.

also, find me here this month. xoxo

a day

a lot happens in a day!...

breakfast dishes alone. black tea and two fried eggs for me, hot rice porridge for her with honey and almond milk and rose tea.

i got these new stackable glasses at a local shop that are perfect for our open shelves and limited storage space.

i've been collecting antique mismatched silverware while out and about.

lunch is often joined by others. i love making a big salad or fried rice. brocolli is always on my lunch menu. and i love a simple platter of cheese and crackers. i've been drinking tons of water throughout the day...trying to offset my tea consumption.

i love the light in the evening. i was working on the computer and looked over to see this. beautiful.

my boys. i love my boys. and apparently they really love each other...see the hug? they spoon and embrace all the time. i love it.

i love watching the shadows as i cook dinner. they seem to capture my movement perfectly.

and the little one is so very content in our new space. she is really loving it all. i was cooking for over an hour tonight and she was happily playing right next to me on the floor.

 

that's just about what our day looks like. how about yours?! xoxo

hello.

i've been looking around, noticing. do you ever do that?

noticing so many things. in just two rooms, we have created a home. we are settled in and happy and feel like we have all the space in the world. we don't need much to be happy. in fact, we need nothing at all because i've come to know that happiness is inside me, and well...that can never be taken away. i'm pretty sure the little one is learning this too. we are a good team, she and i.

my favorite time of day is the quiet time in between work and dinner. where i sit and journal at the table, listening to some Nina Simone, sometimes sipping a glass of wine, watching the sun set and waiting for the dinner guests to arrive. (there are always dinner guests. always.)

last night i was journaling and staring at the page before me filling up with ink, and suddenly the page turned from ivory to gold to pink to orange. it was the most beautiful thing i've ever seen...the sun was setting and just changing and morphing into something completely different every second.

and i began to think about life and how it does the same. things change, shift, morph, evolve. it's what we can count on. it's what makes me so excited about life. i'm an incredibly open person...i think i have a gift of living wide open. i experience everything deeply and fully. i take it all in and acknowledge it; good and bad. and i am grateful for it all. i do not easily get bogged down. i think of everything as a gift. every single thing in life can teach us something if we let it. if we are open to it.

i've been noticing this all. noticing the way the light changes throughout the day, how two rooms can feel so very big, how my awareness can just keep continuing to grow, how my gratitude for everything is so immense that i can't help but love everyday, how i get to witness the little one growing into herself and feeling so very good about where we are.

i'm noticing this change. this shift that feels so very significant to me in my life right now. i can see it everywhere...in my attitude, my gratitude, my awareness, and even my phsyical body. i feel and even look different now. things are changing. and change is hard, but to me hard means good. you push through, you grow, you come out the other side so much more capable than you ever thought you could be.

and even right now, in this very moment, i am noticing how i sat down to simply write about a beautiful sunset, and look what came out. it's all so interesting and wonderful, isn't it?

happy tuesday, friends. thanks for being here. xoxo

Equinox

Happy Spring!! Just some photos from the last few days. We are enjoying our new wee space here, the wonderful light all day long, and the amazing view of the river.

We've had a stretch of amazingly warm weather...temps in the 80's, which means shorts and sandals, open windows, staying out late to ride bikes and scooter through town, skipping rocks in the river and hunting for heart rocks and sea glass. It's just been unbelievable. What a wonderful way to welcome spring!

Hope you are enjoying your week. What did you do to celebrate the return of spring?

Happy Equinox!!

Happenings

 Thanks to all who entered the Polarn O. Pyret giveaway! Random.org chose #77...

andrea said...

always hunting for the right gear here! thanks for the offer :)

Andrea...you didn't include your e-mail, so please e-mail me at ewallacephoto(@)gmail.com and I'll hook you up with Polarn! Congrats!

 

 

Just some happenings from the past few days...

 

• dinner with friends (taco night ROCKS!)
• necklaces from a reader
• thank you letter writing to said reader
• pretending to be a cat in the studio
• an actual cat snoozing in the studio
• daylight savings time love and the sunset streaming through the window
• art in the morning

Hope you all had a good weekend! xo

studio lunch

lunch with some creative peeps. it was yummy.

i sure am enjoying this view. it's just gorgeous. the sunset last night was beyond amazing.

monday i had the pleasure of shooting and modeling Luksin's spring line. it was a beautiful, sunny and warm day. thank goodness, because we had to strip down to barefeet at the beach! check out some of the photos here.

also, i had the pleasure of photographing some beautiful jewelry from the Future Pearl Co. Check out their site to see some of the photos and their gorgeous work!

it's a rainy overcast day here today. it's a nice excuse to hunker down inside with some tea and catch up on a lot of work.

i'm looking forward to doing some more creative shoots in the coming weeks!

what are you up to today?

 

 

around

it's been fun getting to know the light in this new space. it's beautiful...all times of the day.

late afternoon is my favorite. watching the sun set, lighting the candles around the house, making dinner, and getting ready for a cozy evening. the little one and i are settling in and doing well.

i adore this space. i am feeling so capable, brave, strong, and full of life. i am excited about moving forward, discovering new things about myself and life. we are blessed with generous and loving friends. i am thankful for every bit of my life right now.

here's a little glimpse of what's new. my friends call it our "fairy house"...

gratitude

you have no idea just how much each and every one of your comments made me feel so loved and supported. you all are wonderful, caring, generous people. thank you for being here.

this transition has been very hard on all of us. but the little one and i are settling in okay, feeling somewhat challenged by our two room apartment with its limitations, but we are making the best of it. i happen to absolutely adore it! and you are right...it's a tricky thing writing about personal topics on a space like this. i feel that because i tend to focus on the simple things of our days, you often don't see the whole picture. and while i can tell you that i have an inner happiness and strength that i feel is always there through it all, it doesn't mean some things aren't hard. so many of you, i'm sure, found this all to be such a shock. and that's okay. sasa and i adore each other, have so much love for one another, but we are on different paths and we support that need for us as individuals to follow those paths.

many of you asked if we need anything. we are mostly set, and i feel overwhelmingly grateful for those of you who even thought to ask. money is tight, and being self-employed means a somewhat sporatic income. i have been thinking about making an e-book available for download about photography basics and creative photography tips. would that interest anyone? if so, i will start working on it.

and again, thank you. i really wish i could invite each and every one of you over for a cup of tea or a glass of wine. you're support and kind words continue to inspire and amaze me. i am so very lucky, indeed.

xoxo

 

 

Making Do

hello friends.

it's been a while, eh?

there have been big changes over here. not even sure how to say any of this.

but i just will. the little one and i are moving on...we are now situated in our own space. we are happy and excited about the future. so many doors are already opening and i'm grateful for that. friends are taking care of us so very well...the support is overwhelming.

and this is my path. this is exactly where i should be and there's no arguing that. and i'm okay with it. i can see what a gift everything has been and continues to be.

i am reminded of this quote...

"And I find that each time that you fall, you're just becoming who you are."

-Mainstay

as i sit at the kitchen table, sipping tea and looking out over the river (yes! beautiful river views!), i feel so very happy and at peace. i am home.

 

i'll get back to regular posting soon! hope you are all well, my friends!

full

our life is so very full these days. so very full. it's all i can do to just take a few simple breaths, click the shutter a few times at the beauty around me, and find some simple words for this space.

but i wanted to pass on some things i'm loving:

• Oh Land
• Already Yours
• this song and video is the sweetest
• look for me in the Pop Up Shop in a week! If you know anyone who's getting married, let them know! Major discount on my wedding packages!
• i'm loving Closet Visit
• i want these bangles
• loving Black Crane clothing
• oh, how i wish i could afford these for summer
• i saw this in person...it is fabulous.

What are you loving this week?

chasing light

i spent the morning chasing light around the house. i've never experienced a Maine winter quite like this. so warm. i've been wearing my tweed blazers, scarf around my neck, and newsboy cap when walking around town, just soaking up the sunlight. i don't mind the lack of snow, or the warm temperatures.

today, walking through town i smelled grass. green growing grass. like spring. and i stopped, took a deep breath, smiled, and walked on. i thought about how sweet it smelled and how exciting the changing of the seasons are...especially coming out of the hibernation of winter. it's like a brand new start every year to look forward to.

for now, i am enjoying the sun streaming through the windows, reaching into corners and changing as the day progresses. there's nothing more beautiful than light...

And, I'm in Love

Had my first painting lesson yesterday with Lari. It was amazing and wonderful and I had so much fun. I decided to work on a few collages for an upcoming art night. And I finished three, plus started two other acrylics!

I'm smitten with painting. Absolutely love it. Can't wait to do more. Next week I'm headed to the big city for some supplies!

Thanks Lari!!

 

What are you all working on this week?

gathering

We've been talking a lot about strengthening our social community for a year now. 2011 was the year of big bashes, lots of music and dancing, BBQs, bonfires, karaoke, and potlucks. This year, we have grand plans for simple entertaining; shifting the focus from large gatherings to intimate dinners and quiet evenings. I think we're all ready for this shift, and I'm excited to see what this year will bring.

To start, I've spent the week so far painting the new dining room. I'm almost done, which is very exciting...I've never painted for 4 days straight before. It's tough work! After the walls are finally done, the floor is next. Then the table will hopefully be finished and in the house, we'll be on the hunt for mismatched wooden chairs, although ideally I'd love folding chairs like these.

With the new dining room, we can gather with a few other couples, have a simple meal, and maybe follow that with some music making or game playing. We're so excited for this simple shift.

 

For the past couple of months, we've been starting this trend with various friends. Mostly to lighten the load of cooking everyday of the week...we've been spontaneously gathering at various houses to enjoy a meal prepared by everyone, with a single ingredient brought to use. It helps our budgets and we also end up having a good conversation, or delving into some kind of art project. It's always fun, and so mellow with no expectations or grand plans. I love that.

I'm looking forward to a mellow 2012, full of good food, good people, and good conversations! And I can't wait to show you all the finished dining room! I'm off to paint another coat...

xoxo

sick as a dog

well, new year's did me in!

i've been sick as a dog since. sasa had this a couple of weeks ago and he said he is just now starting to feel better.

i took this picture in the late afternoon when i headed upstairs to take a nice long bath filled with eucalyptus oils. i've never noticed that light before. it was beautiful. definitely one of my resolutions to take more late afternoon baths in 2012.

what are your resolutions for this year?

Holidaying

Well, I love getting things out in the open. Writing, processing, getting it all out there...it all helps in taking a step back and really observing the situation and how you'd like to proceed with it. Nothing has changed except my attutide about it. I've always made the best of whatever I'm given, but even with doing that I can still feel mournful for what I know could be. But, enough of that! It couldn't BE because it ISN'T! So I am making the best of what I've got while accepting that it's exactly what it is, and could never be anything else.

That probably sounds like much more nonsense all written out than it actually is in my head. But there it is. Thanks for being there through it all. This space is such a gift.

We've surely been making the best of our time this holiday season. Lots of baking, present making, cookie delivering, tree decorating, and holiday music singing (shall I mention the night the little one and I had an impromptu caroling experience? we skipped merrily while singing around the neighborhood like silly people in the dark!). And there are the things like the Christmas cards that will never be finished or even make it in the mail (how about New Year's cards?!), the tins of treats I wanted to make and deliver, the presents I can't afford, and all the rest that just aren't meant to be. And that's okay. Because with what we have, we are having so much fun with it. And that's the best.

I haven't even been capturing all our daily activities with my camera. Taking even a second away from those moments seems like too much. Sometimes I pull my iPhone out and capture the goodness. So above is all the goodness from cooking baking (twice!), packaging, delivering, and holiday cheer around town. We have been having so much fun...!

What have you been up to this holiday season?!

The winner! and my studio! and some links!!

Thanks to all who entered the giveaway! Random number generator chose commenter #93, which would be....

Susan said...

oh my goodness... what NOT to choose?? i love the surprise bowls and cups, the mini mushrooms and the red birds on parade bowl, just to start. i will be back to visit this shop, for sure!!

thanks for helping me discover it and should i be so lucky to win.

 

Susan...I'll send you an e-mail! Congrats!

 

Have I ever shown you guys my studio space? I can't remember if I ever did. My gals affectionally refer to it as the "girl cave" where we have art night and chill. We have lots of fun up here. And I get a ton of work done too. Everyone is happy! Well, here it is...

 

My favorite corners?! The little one's horse wall (she has also drawn me amazing photos of cameras) which are mostly old except for the top right corner. I love that one. I also love my bookshelf under the window with all my art books. I love my plants. My inspiration wall is crazy and out of hand, but I love it like that. It's like a visual of the inside of my mind. Crazy and awesome all at once.

So that's where I spend my days working. I'd really like to paint the room, but I just didn't have time before moving up here. So it will stay this color for a while. It's growing on me. At night I always have candles going, and it's pretty cozy up here.

And here are some links I'm loving at the moment:

• i've never been into music like this before, but i am loving this today. feels like my mood at the moment. strong, confident, and a bit crazy!
• i love this beautiful selby film for ZARA. i want her glasses.
• finding her blog visually inspiring
• i'm painting the downstairs the next few weeks. can't wait to have a dining room like this!
• have you seen the new marcel?!! we were literally on the floor laughing...
• a friend suggested our annual new year's eve bash should have a dress code of sequins...i was thinking something like this
• inspired by her work and can't wait to meet up with her after the holidays!
• audrey's the cutest
• i want this print for our new dining room!
• this pic of maria's is amazing. the mood she captured is unreal.
• this looks like something i'd wear everyday
• this movie was amazing and so absolutely gorgeous. 

What are you loving my friends? Also, thank you for the super sweet and encouraging words on my post a few days back. They mean the world. You sure know exactly what to say. Thank you. xoxo

 

here, there, and everywhere

 

So, here I am again...making excuses for my absence and lack of presence. The truth about it all?! Well, juggling a little one going back and forth between two households, and adding in her schooling...well, it leaves us with not much.

I've tried to keep most of this out of my space here, but the reality of it is that it's hard. It's hard on everyone. As it is now, she left Saturday morning and I won't see her again until Thursday afternoon. Then I rush her to her violin lesson upon pickup from school, then it's home for dinner, then it's bath time, then it's bed. And that's pretty  much how our days go. They fly by without time for thinking about anything other than just getting through the day.

As a mama, I struggle with having this energy and desire to be with her, create with her, teach her about the world, show her how gentle life can be, slow down and breathe with her, focus on being together and enjoying those simple things about daily life that we have for 5 years now. But really? There isn't much time for that. Not at all. She comes and goes so quickly, I often feel like I have 5 minutes with her. The days pass quickly. The weeks pass by even faster. The months? Well, I blink and those are gone too.

What am I left with? I'm left with just making it through the day with her and her school life, social life, and all the normal challenges of just being five. And then, on the days we actually have time together, we try to squeeze in a special picnic or hike or trip to the beach or visit with friends, but now even that is all feeling like just too much. Which is really sad. Because what does that really leave a family with?

St. Nicholas Day passed us by while she was at her Papa's house. We made it up for her this weekend. The start of Advent passed by even faster, and trying to keep track of an Advent calendar when she is only here for such a short time seems impossible. Traditions are hard. The magical things we like to do as a family for her and create for her seem so challenging now.

This space feels as empty as I do. I have my business, our busy social life, activities, wonderful alone time with Sasa, and so much more to keep me full. And it does. But there is that intention and awareness we've always had in our lives that really focuses on the little one. And without her, there is a kind of grief for something that once was...and for how childhood should be.

So that's where I am, my friends. Just feeling like all I can do with her absence is focus on myself. Personally, I feel a growth taking place. A magical wonderful growth that I am proud of and so ready for. But there is also a reluctant move away from something that has been for so long, and that we truly miss and aren't ready to be done with.

I'm sure this sounds more dramatic than it all is. I just felt I owed you all an explanation. I am pretty busy over here and here. So I'm not far...

And there will be some giveaways coming up! So don't miss those!! Check in tomorrow...

And, as always, thanks so much for being here. Your support is always exactly what is needed. xo.

Some Killer Links

We had the sweetest little photo session with Maria this past weekend. This image she captured was my favorite, but there were so many good ones.

We have been having such a fun time lately. It's hard juggling school, work, afterschool activities, an amazingly social wee one who is always out running around the neighborhood with friends from early morning to sunset, a busy social weekend life, and then we do it all again. Our time to slow down, breathe, and just be together seems to be few and far between, but we do manage to make the best of every moment we have together; no matter how short.

Today marks the third anniversary of living in this house. It's a special day for Sasa and I. I, of course, completely forgot about it because I am still not convinced it's remotely possible for it to be December. And Sasa, being the sweet guy he is, reminded me at dinner. Oops. So what did I do? I turned our kitchen into an after dinner dance party! We put it on a favorite dancing Pandora station and proceeded to boogie and do the twist and slow dance for the next two hours.

Then the little one put the wicker laundry basket on her back and pretended to be a turtle, which Mama and Sasa bear had to try to eat. But she was a good turtle and curled right up into her shell where she was safe. We ended the night with some drawing before bed. That girl...I swear...she is never NOT drawing. It's insane. I buy her art journals every other day, and they are full before I can get back to the art store. And pens. And pencils. And anything she can draw with. They all get so much use. Her drawings are amazing too. Unbelievable, actually. She's on a horse kick, but she has just started drawing mama with her camera. Cool stuff. She's goooood.

And that's my update. We're all in a silly mood tonight. Dancing does that to us. So here's some pretty sweet links:

• i wanna be your man (how freakin' cool is that dude?!)
• absolutely A-mazing 
• i got inspired and painted my nails this color today
• made this into a necklace. i love it.
• love these tumblers
• enjoying her blog
• this series is gorgeous. she makes everyday beautiful.
• mmmm....for brunch with friends
• i have a horrible addiction to mugs (and tea)
• have you seen melissa's new book?! she was also on the macy's day parade AND martha stewart!! woohoo! go melissa!
• loving his artwork
• one more video. i'm going to style a shoot inspired by it.
• looking forward to this tomorrow night

Happy December! What are you loving right now?!

i'm not ready yet.

It's snowing! The first real winter snowfall. We woke up to plows going by in the wee hours of the morning. The snow is thick and wet and heavy. The chickens are not amused in the least, but it sure is beautiful. There's something about a snowfall, no matter how not ready you are, that makes you want to curl up with a wool blanket, a good book, and a hot cup of tea...even if you're not ready to put the swimsuits away yet.

As my eyes slowly opened this morning, all I could think of was that cup of tea and that book. But today it's another day of work. And that's okay too. But there's tea...there's always tea.

And, because remembering is good, here's some film shots from a little late summer picnic we had in the woods with friends.

Happy Thanksgiving, my friends. I hope you all have a good one. xo.

 

absence

Phew! Sorry for the abense my friends! Life has been, well....life. Busy and full and lovely and crazy and everything in between. Sometimes the weeks fly by and the one simple thing I've been meaning to do gets undone; like posting here. I miss you all! And I miss being in this space.

Life has been very full. Full of good food, get togethers, friends, creating, work (and lots of it), mothering, partnering, and trying to breathe in the midst of it all.

This past weekend, the little one and I had an afternoon in the big city with our friends. My assistant and I are cooking up something goooood with a certain talented someone in the big city after the holidays. So we took a couple of hours to brainstorm and check out some spaces. After we walked around the city taking some shots for a few minutes. Maria snapped these of the little one and I. I adore them. Love them. I hardly ever have photos of us together. It means so much.

And, oh my...how she has grown. I just started photographing her in a very different way. She is no longer this cute little toddler. She's matured. She's got emotions behind those eyes and expressions. It's amazing to witness and even more amazing to capture. She's the best model anyone could ever ask for. She's opening up more to the camera too. I can't wait to see where it takes us....

How are you all? I hope you are all well and enjoying life. I'll be back soon...promise.

slow

02 Hang On Sloopy

thanks for your sweet comments about sasa's pop. it really made me feel a whole lot better reading every single one of them. you guys are the greatest.

i'm wrapping up an 8 hour day on the computer designing albums, sending in submissions, and chatting with clients, when i came across this picture....

one day after the death of sasa's pop, i headed out for my first shoot for a magazine.
after a long drive, the writer and i finally arrived to a cabin full of sweet guys.
an hour later we found ourselves sitting around the fire, singing every country song we could remember, me on the guitar, another guy on the banjo.
the writer snapped this of me. i kinda love it. we were singing "hang on sloopy" and singing like a bunch of crazy people. play the tune above and you can hear it. (not our version!)
it was a sweet time up there, in the maine woods.

i'm having one of those days where i feel so very grateful for everything. for my work, my love, my friends, my home, my family...sometimes it just overwhelms me with how wonderful it all is. even despite the challenges, there is just so much good there. it's all so much sometimes i think my heart might burst...literally. have you ever felt that? you get this incredibly light feeling, where you feel like your heart will jump out of your chest and float up into the sky like a balloon and you'll be left gazing at it in amazement.

it's just one of those days. what are you feeling grateful for today?

poor little one

she's been sick on and off for four weeks.

there is so much going around school, it's hard to tell what's what. but we are certain it's Lyme's now.

the treatment is a bit daunting...so many antibiotics for so long, but i'm grateful for the option and her health to start to improve.

poor little e!

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in other news... have you guys seen:

• svpply
• how to manifest what you want
• pinhole press' holiday gift ideas? love!
• my pinterst account is overflowing with inspiration and goodness.
• seriously breathtaking
• moutain songs
• cat vs. balloon. HILARIOUS!

what are you loving this week?! happy monday, friends!

around here

Around here there is one itchy, tired person.

One incredibly caring and generous person who takes care of the itchy tired person.

And one little coughing person who is desperately claiming she is still "really sick!" so she can stay home from school tomorrow.

 

But we have settled into a rather nice rhythm. Taking it easy, eating lots of veggies to help our bodies heal (I am adding seaweed to everything these days...), admiring Mr. Pickles who seems to have nailed the art of naps, and early bedtimes for all.

Tomorrow I start on the little one's Halloween costume. She waited until four days ago to finally decide. It's a good one, and quite fitting for her.

Hope you are all enjoying October and staying well!!

Just got a bunch of medium format goodness back in the mail.

This is one of my favorites. She was having such a good time in Boston. I can't wait to take her back.

I am slowly recovering from all my illnesses (which I apparently picked up in Boston), and now I'm battling a nasty bout of poison ivy. My friend has lovingly nicknamed me "itchy and scratchy".

How are you, my friends?!

i figured it out...

yup. i figured it out. i am stuck here with the flu, going on NINE days with a fever and sinus issues.

that's why i've been a little more absent than i planned.

BUT...i figured it out! this will be my digital space, my family space, and my update space.

my other little corner will be devoted to film, to growing, to myself.

 

okay. back to resting and working (not at the same time).

 

enjoy your tuesday, friends!

it's not much

and i wanted it that way.
i really don't feel like announcing it to the world.
thinking of keeping the ol' blog going just to stick around a bit. i would miss you all too much, that's for sure.
but i love my simple space.

i love that everytime i open it up, i breathe.
that's exactly what i needed.

i'll be a little bit here, a little bit there, and a little bit everywhere.

 

goodbye.

goodbye summer
this was our farewell harvest.
such a bitter sweet day.

we leave tomorrow for an extended weekend in boston.
we are all excited about seeing the city. the little one can't wait to ride on the T!

i shoot a wedding sunday, then it's back home for us.
i've been in work mode for ages now. working 12+ hour days, exhausting myself trying to keep up with deadlines, when new ones just keep coming my way.

i started a new space. i'm not ready to share yet.
it's so minimal. so much white. i love it.
no links, no banner, no books, no sponsors, no comments.
just me.
that's all it is.
it's so different that i feel like i have my own little private space out there with no expectations, no opinions, and no responsibilities.
i kinda like it that way. so i've kept it my own little secret for a while now.
but it'll soon be known.

until then...you get some tomatillos. i'm bringing all my gear to boston obviously, but my 35mm will be with me everyday.
see you then, my friends. xoxo

goodbye summer, hello tomorrow

Some shots from August taken with my film camera. Boy, how summer passed us by. I miss it already. But I'm also looking forward to knitting, cozy nights on the couch under a warm blanket, and snow ball fights!

I have two weddings left this season...both in Massachuessets. I feel like I've been a bit absent from this space lately. Partly because I have been spending 10 hours a day editing photos and doing computer work, and the last thing I can think about is editing more for this space. Then I just feel like our lives are moving so very quickly. So much is happening (good stuff!), we are really trying to live in the moment and enjoying a little simplicity in the midst of some very busy things (my business primarily), and the little one is growing oh so fast.

This space feels like it needs to morph into something more...or less. My life has changed. My inspiration and motivation and way of seeing the world has changed. I am finding that finally, at 28, I have discovered who I am and what I'm capable of.

This space comes up a lot in my thoughts. You come up a lot in my thoughts! I love it here. I love you all. I am inspired and humbled and motivated by you. I am incredibly grateful for all of you.

So, what am I saying? I'm not really sure yet. I want to find a way to make this space more me. And I'm going to work on that. I'm hoping you will all be here to see it.

xoxo.

loving.

Thank you for all your birthday wishes!! You are the sweetest! Here is a little list of loveliness for you!

• so yea, i got the high waisted kahkis and they rock. 
• loving this
• can't get enough of this stream
• kind of want giant black glasses like this
• totally love love loving the above dress from Ruche!!! (oh, how i want this dress!!)
• this has to be the most beautiful song i've ever heard
• grain free pizza? YES!

What are you loving this week?

the swing of things

It's funny having a different rhythm all of a sudden. Waking early to get things prepared for the day, driving the little one off to school, coming back to work until the moment I go back to pick her up, picking her up and coming home to have a snack, resting, going for a walk, dinner prep and eating, clean up and outside play before bedtime. There's something comforting in the rhythm that we've already formed, just in a mere three days. I like knowing what to expect. I like having things consistent, but with enough flexibility to make the day feel spontaneous and free.

Right now we are settling into this new rhythm. We are a bit tired, a bit excited, a bit relieved (to have more time to get work done!). But mostly, we are just happy to be doing it all together. Lucky us!

thoughts on a busy life

We all lead busy lives. We all lead hectic lives. Most of us probably try to lead these busy lives with all intentions of simplicity, and well...still run around all day wondering when we'll actually get a moment to just be.

Sometimes at the end of the day, when I finally finish parenting, working, taking care of the house and animals, I wonder if I'd ever actually breathed at all? Or did I ever even sit down?!  I get so caught up in the moment, and then the next, and the next one after that, that is seems as though the day flies by and my intentions of simplicity and slowness get devoured by the pace of life.

But then I get photos like these back. I remember these moments. I remember the slowness, the simplicity, the awareness...all present when I took each one. And I am reminded that in the midst of the chores, keeping track of a little one, the cooking and cleaning, and running a business, that there really is plenty of those moments that I strive for all day long. They are there, however brief. These photos are a reminder of that. Just looking at them now makes my breath slower, my heart rate slows, and I feel grateful for the little moments like this that make up our days.

It is, really, all about balance. xoxo

Expired film from a kind reader! Thank you! I haven't touched my digital camera in days. Also, please check out the new sponsors on the right! Yay!

loving.

Lately I am loving ::

• stripes and plaid
• eating chard or kale with quinoa for lunch (with a little hot sauce to top it off)
• mr. pickles and my $7 shoes
• my love of high waisted pleated kahkis. oh yes, you did hear correctly.
• tea with friends on rainy afternoons
• this album which i can not get enough of
• this photo
• all the delicious food sasa keeps filling my belly with
• this photographer, because i think she's awesome

What are you loving today?

thoughts

I am sitting here at 10 p.m. after a day full of fun and a night filled with work. I am reviewing the three photos of the day (the ones you see above) after designing cards for an upcoming wedding and editing a bazillion photos.

My cup of tea is warming my hands and I'm reminded just how fast things are moving...the summer is disappearing before our eyes, the little one is growing up and will be off to school soon (three half days a week, but still...), and my business is thankfully taking off but requires so much more time than I actually have.

But photos like these remind me to slow down, breathe a little more deeply, and know there are those quiet moments in our day which ground us and bring comfort knowing that these things will always be.

What helps to ground you?

it's an iphone day

I did pick up my actual camera today, honest. But really...these iphone photos were so much better. And way easier to upload here after a long day and much work to do tonight. We made strawberry scones this morning for a special friend's birthday, then delivered the rest all over town. I got a new scarf (love!) from here, we had a ukulele and violin concert for friends, and ended the evening playing tag in a field until the sun set. So much fun!

I'm trying to get all my ducks in a row for this California trip...finishing up last minute "to-do" lists and trying to figure out how to bring two camera bags, a bag full of lighting equipment, a bag full of tripods, a carry on, and a suitcase (not to mention Sasa's stuff) on the plane. Considering that they will not be liable for any damage to photographic equipment, and the price for 4 suitcases is an astounding $300. Yea. Ideas?!

Hope you have a good Thursday! xo

monday thoughts

my usual monday link list will have to be saved for another monday.

i worked most of the day today, with a brief break to go to the farmer's market. it's now 8 p.m. and i still have hours to go.

we've been enjoying some beans from the garden lately. enough for us and friends too.

tomorrow will be a day at the beach, weather permitting.

have you noticed the new sponsors in the sidebar? so many talented artists!

i'm kind of sitting here hoping for a thunderstorm. so many days of hot temperatures. a break would be nice.

what are you doing this monday evening?

fairy woods

It's been a funny weekend. Probably others would call it a weekend full of unfortunate events. I've been meaning to post about "a year of choice" for a while now...letting you know more about how this affects my days and what it looks like. And I can honestly say that this space is all about choice. What you read here are snippets of our days. The things I love, the things that make life go round, the things that make us smile, the things that fill our hearts with love. It doesn't mean that there isn't a whole lot of struggle and, ahem, bad luck too. (Sometimes I think I'm jinxed!) But it's easy to get through it with this fabulous guy and amazing little girl by my side.

This past weekend was indeed a series of unfortunate events. It got to the comical level after two days, and when we finally sat down on the couch late last night to breathe, we looked at each other and giggled, joking that maybe the roof would fall through on our heads. But in the end, we caught something just in the knick of time and our cat will live, we still have another way to get around and we did get home finally, there are friends and family always willing to help, after hours of research I finally fixed my camera, and we are safe and happy and together. Which really...is all that matters.

So what does all this have to do with fairy woods?! Well, in the midst of all the unfortunate events, we all took a beautiful walk on an island with my mama and the two dogs. We flew kites, we walked through the forest, waded in the water, and came to the spot where there are hundreds and hundreds of fairy houses. We built a fabulous one. And I remember in that moment, looking at the absolute certainty on the little one's face that fairies would be moving in to our little fairy house that very night, I knew that this was the only moment that really mattered. And, to be honest, I'm not sure if it's from the sheer exhaustion or the hilariously poor memory I have, but really...it's all that I really remember. That one moment was so full of joy and love that it's going to be completely and totally stuck in my heart forever. Love that.

And yes, the little one got her first haircut. She loves it. We do too.

xoxo.

It's Tuesday, but who cares

So I didn't get to my link list yesterday, so some Tuesday links you shall get! Yay!

My friend wanted some photos of me in the dress she made for her shop, so Sasa took these tonight. I just love this dress...it's been perfect for the super hot summer days we've been having. I've also been drinking lots of iced tea. Tons actually. Like 4-5 cups a day. Is that bad?!

For the past three days I've put in more than 30 hours on the computer editing images. My eyes are going all googley and I'm pretty sure my bum fell asleep more than twice. But it feels good to be doing this work, and I've got one more day to go before the little one finally returns and we can have some fun!

I've been working so much that I've hardly had time to eat, but thank goodness my lovely man keeps me well fed with yummy lunches and dinners! He made kale chips tonight and a yummy egg and avocado salad. So now I have a happy tummy.

Okay, here are some links!

• this song makes me dance
• i'm also enjoying lots of oldies
• i want to eat this. yum.
• oh my CUTE!
• i want these for the fall. yes, these sweltering days have me dreaming of sweaters and hot apple cider.
• just because!
• awwwwww
• this lovely lady sent me the best package ever yesterday!
• have you seen this? it's a funky way to get your body MOOOVIN'! (and you kind of feel cool doing it...)
• have you "liked" my facebook page yet?! join me!
• i may just have to get these
• hello there, i'm moving in

That's all folks! What are you loving this week?!

happy weekend!

It's Sunday night, we just got back from a date on the town (food and wine on the patio at a local restraurant, then the new Woody Allen film at the local theater which was fantastic!). We rode on our vintage bikes, me with my new chiffon dress and Sasa as his handsome self. It was kind of a magical evening, complete with snagging the movie poster and taping it on a friend's door, who loved the movie so much it was her second time seeing it!

But this picture of the little one this morning is my favorite thing about this weekend. We are out there drawing on the sidewalks every day that is sunny. This early morning it was already sweltering...the heat has been incredible here. This morning as we were drawing hearts side by side, I looked at her and just completely marveled at how much she's grown. Such a big difference between the 3's and 4's. She's growing up and it's funny that I'll never see anything but my little baby. She always jokes and says, "Mama...even when I'm a big grown up, you will still want to hold me, won't you?" And I answer with, "Of course! I will always try." And to that, she gives me a big hug and a kiss, snuggles in my arms for a minute, then runs off to play. What sweet thing this parenting journey is.

What was your favorite part of the weekend?!

 

today

Today I woke up late, went for a run, made sun tea, ate a delicious lunch Paleo style (it's working and I feel great!), mowed the lawn, weeded the garden, started sorting through the 3,500+ photos from a beautiful wedding, did four loads of laundry, threw open the windows to let in that (finally) summer air, cleaned the kitchen, and took the dogs for a walk.

It's a quiet day here, and I'm trying to settle into that and appreciate its gift to me. The little one is off with her Papa and I have the whole day to devote to me; whatever I want to do. I've been taking care of myself, moving slowly and honoring my body's needs, and letting myself finish up those tasks that require a little extra effort and concentration. It's been a good day.

Now I'm headed to the farmer's market for some fresh veggies and meat, then it's off to a bbq.

Happy Monday! xoxo

hello and goodbye

in the midst of

running around getting six bags of camera gear ready,

rounding up directions, phone numbers, last minute details, and making lists,

searching for the two cords that will actually make my lighting work (kind of important!),

emptying camera cards, charging batteries, checking and double checking lenses,

and trying to find enough dressy yet "i can still bend over reeaally far or lay upside down on the ground" clothes for two nights...

 

i am here to say hello! and goodbye! headed three states over for a wedding until Sunday night. until then, admire our inspirational sidewalk art, the little one's super sweet grown-up looking face, and hope for June weather that doesn't have us wearing long pants and fleece jackets!

oh, and thanks for all the coop love! can't wait to find the time to check out yours! xoxo

hello monday

Why hello there, Monday. It's been a while since you've had your spotlight here in this space. Sorry about that. I blame it on the garden and the weather and a fabulous little one and just having so many fun things to do. But this evening I find myself with a few spare minutes, and I thought I'd put in some quality time with you. So Monday, here we go!

I found this dress for about $4 at a local shop. It's comfy, lightweight jersey and makes a perfect everyday dress. However, I think the black color deceives people because everyone asked me why I was so dressed up, or where I was going tonight. I just chuckled, told them the dress cost me $4 and I gardened in it today, and walked away feeling pretty fancy in my $4 dress. Just as Sasa was taking this picture, two beautiful birds flew right overhead and I glanced up at them right as the shutter clicked.

Okay, here are my favorite links at the moment!

• loving this song right now. the video is so haunting.
• so in love with Fleet Foxes. I think I've downloaded all their albums!
• loving these basic layers
• cutest kids clothes ever
• great tutorial for button flies!
• i am going to try to fit in some sewing time this week to make a giant beach bag. we really need one!
• camp journals rock!
• absolutely adore these postcards
• peek-a-boo
• i want to visit here and nap on that couch
• super sweetness right here
• i want a wagoneer
• so i found out i'm allergic to all grains. looks like i'm going on the caveman diet! woohoo.
• loving these dresses. and the name? love.

Okay all...what are YOU loving this Monday?!

On Monday

Wow...you all loved Seed and Sky! Yay! A big thanks to Kelcey for the giveaway! Random.org chose #49 ::

Jules said...

Ooh, I just had a look at it all, it's gorgeous. Thanks for the giveaway, Erin.

So Jules, send me an e-mail (ewallacephoto@gmail.com) and we'll get your earrings out to you!

..................................................................................................................................................................................

On Monday I...

went out wearing my ripped up, covered in paint jeans paired with a gauzy shirt and my favorite shoes. I felt comfortable.

stopped for a quick thrift and found some treasures.

admired our new artwork by this amazing artist.

did a little sewing for the little one's summer wardrobe.

admired all the plants on the doorstep waiting to go into the ground once this rain stops.

 

What did you do on your Monday?

Brrrr

Well, I thought about doing my big garden post today, but I have so many sweet links to share. So the garden post will make its debut tomorrow. Yay!

We're still having this crazy cold rainy weather. It was below 50 today, and between the dampness and the colder air, I was chilly all day long. I drank four cups of black tea too. So hard to wake up on days like this.

The basil and tomatillos are rotting out there in rain, which makes me so sad. Luckily, I've got some more going inside. Sasa is making fiddlehead pasta for dinner tonight with lots of garlic. Yum. I'm a lucky woman.

The above picture is a scene you'll find here often in this rainy weather. We've been doing lots of cooking, baking, water kefir prepping, tea making, and eating lately. Today we baked chocolate chip cookies. Really good chocolate chip cookies too. I love baking with my girl.

Okay, here's some links!

• helplessness blues runs through my head all day long. love it.
• those kids must have had so much fun.
• going to see them tomorrow night! yay!
• saving. saving. saving.
• any locals out there, check out "A Tribute to Muriel" concert on Sunday May 29th at 4 p.m. I hear it's going to be amazing!!
• good idea
• anthropologie contacted me today about their new tumblr account! check it out. great stuff there!
• got a bunch of succulents from here
• oh yea. 
• love this.
• at least summer is somewhere
• like a painting
• i want to be in a parade!
• can i please live there too?

Okay, leave me with some of your favorite links for the week! See you tomorrow in the garden...

growth, change, and renewal

robins have been finding me everywhere lately.

they come to my windows, they fly by me while i run, they stare at me from their perch in our trees, they land on our porch during meals, and they seem to love being around me while i garden. the robin is a symbol of growth, change, and renewal. and i feel that it is so true in our lives right now. i want to spend my days tapping into the robin's wisdom.

we are beginning a week of rain. it's pouring outside as i write this and the rain has kept me in doing some spring cleaning and lots of work all day.

i thought it was time for a new look here too. so i played around a bit and came up with something i think just might last for a while. hope you like it.

what are your plans of the week?!

 

Sponsor Giveaway :: Ruche!!

Thanks for all who entered the giveaway for Markets of New England!! It was such fun reading your comments! The winner is ::

shell said...

What a great idea for a book! I bet the pics are amazing! The colors are my favorite part of the farmers markets here in Chicago, but the one thing I can never leave without is the ginormous honeycrisp apples.

So Shell, please e-mail me with your address and your book will be on its way! Congrats!

Oh man...what can I say about Ruche?! The best clothes ever, the most amazingly inspiring "Lookbooks", it's affordable, and they are super great to work with! When they first contacted me about sponsoring my blog, I was beyond thrilled. I love their aesthetic and I've finally found a source for clothes that fit my style and body!

They were sweet enough to send me a dress to model! The first is a sweet little lace dress that I love to layer with some linen pants and a ballet sweater. And the second one is a new staple...as is, with a belt, or over jeans. I just love, love, love it! We had so much fun doing this shoot! Thank you Ruche for the amazing opportunity and the wonderful clothes!

If you're interested in seeing more, please go to the private gallery here. Password is "rucherocks"!

• Photographed by Peter Shellenberger
• Styled by Meghan Costello
• Dresses from Ruche
• Hats and jewelry from Darling & DeLisle

Ruche is offering a $25 gift certificate to one lucky reader! Just leave a comment with your favorite item from their online store and I'll draw a winner on Wednesday at 8 p.m. EST. Good luck!!